Do you have Prince Albert in a Can?

The prompt, "Share something you learned embarrassingly late in life."

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I really hoping I'm not the only one, but I seriously didn't understand the joke about having Prince Albert in a can until maybe two years ago.

When I heard it, I always thought of this Prince Albert:

In this kind of can:

And it just didn't make sense to me.

Finally I had had enough. I took a deep breath and admitted my great shame to Husband. Once he started breathing again from laughing at me so hard, he explained that the joke was about this:

Prince Albert Smoking Tobacco that comes...wait for it...in a can. Yeah. I'm an idiot. Now if someone could just explain to me why this is funny...

{+}

Wordless Wednesday {Going On A Bug Hunt}

Birthday Recap

My birthday was awesome...ignoring the fact that I turned 35.

I got to sleep in, and Hubs and Pie got me coffee and breakfast. Then Pie gave me the best birthday card ever.

And then she went outside, found this beauty, handed it to me and yelled "SURPRISE!!" Goodness does that kid crack me up. 

Then Pie and I got our finger paint on. 

And were completely exhausted by all the creativity, so a nap was next up. 

Then dinner and margaritas with the family. Such fun and so tasty. 

At the end of the meal, my mom surprised me with these amazing, tiny bundt cakes. They're from a place called Nothing Bundt Cake...hehehe...and they are 2-3 bite versions of the normal thing but SO MUCH BETTER. Yum. 

And when a came into work this morning, my friends had decorated my office and bought me some beautiful flowers. So sweet. 

But wait, there's more. I get to celebrate all over again this weekend with a big family brunch and a real, no kids allowed, date with Husband. I can't wait.

35

I Can Do Better....Can't I?

My life is full of "those" moments. You know the ones where teachers, bosses, parents say that you aren't living up to your potential?

I've got millions of them. In fact my entire school career, until I went back as an adult to finish my Bachelor's, was one never-ending moment. I can't even count the number of times I got into trouble because my teacher thought I was coasting by, or my parents felt I was doing the bare minimum. The truth is...I was. I always figured if I did well enough not trying, why kill myself to do slightly better?

Granted that was all when I was a kid and knew everything. And certainly knew more than the grown-ups in my life. :) Ahhh, sweet, stupid youth.

But as I got older, I realized that was a cop out. I really didn't try very hard. I really wasn't working at my full potential, and I wanted to change that about myself. So I started trying. And yes, it was a lot more work. And yes, it made me more vulnerable to failure. But it was good.

I strive to be good at the things I choose to spend my time doing. I hope that I'm a good daughter, sister, wife, mother, friend, student, employee...I really try to be.

But lately...I'm back to coasting by. And the thing that kills me is that there's nothing I can do about it. My eyes are shot. They hurt all the time. If I use them a lot, it gives me a crazy headache, and often makes me throw up. And it's affecting every. single. part. of. my. life.

I'm a terrible employee, a lackluster student, an absentee wife, a sideline mom. I haven't been to any one's blog to see how they are, and I'm barely here on my own blog. All of those things hurt. And each one makes this whole situation a little worse each day.

Just know that I really do miss you guys, and I keep trying to get better.

I'm still hoping that's possible...

Silly Straws Make Everything Better

My darling Pie had a very exciting milestone this weekend. She used her first silly straw...and she's hooked!

Which works for me because I could watch that little mouth pucker and those mile-long lashes flutter with excitement all day long.

*It also happened to be the first time she had lemonade...so she was digging that too. :)

We DO NOT put boogies BACK INTO our nose....and other ladylike things I've said lately.

So if you've been around for awhile, you know that I'm quite the delicate flower. Always proper and reserved, easily offended, always...what?!...you know I can actually hear you laughing through the interwebs. Shut it!

But lately it seems I've had the occasion to say a number of really unladylike things. And because they all made me laugh, I figured I'd share.

1. "We DO NOT put boogies BACK INTO our nose."
    ~said to Pie as she proceeded to do just that.

2. "A few more of these margaritas and you're right!"
    ~said to my mom and dad and sister and brother in law after my mom commented on my
     recent weight loss by saying my pants were going to fall off.

3. "Every time I move it feels like someone is punching my in the right ass cheek."
    ~said to Husband the day after I fell down our stairs and landed quite hard on said cheek.

4. "Would you mind rubbing my butt?"
    ~said to Husband after falling down the stairs in the least come on-y way ever.

5. "Do you think it would be wrong of me to use the phrase 'balls deep' more often?"
    ~said to Husband after reading the phrase in a book.

6. "Hey Toots!"
    ~said to Pie (while laughing hysterically) after she made some noises that only frat boys
    should be able to make.

7. "Apparently she pooped."
    ~said to random Walmart customer with a shrug after Pie announced it to the store.



Hope you all have a wonderful weekend filled with lots of unladylike comments! XXOXX