Woody's Roundup, but with fewer cowboys

1. The Red Dress Club strikes again...

This week's prompt for Red Writing Hood is based on dramatic entrance, courtesy of Webook. Write a short story based on this prompt:An art opening at a lavish downtown gallery. A car crashes through the plate glass window. The driver's door opens, and an eight-year-old girl steps out.We're looking forward to seeing how everyone handles the same exact opening!

Okay...so here's the result.

An art opening at a lavish downtown gallery. A car crashes through the plate glass window. The driver's door opens, and an eight-year-old girl steps out.

She crushes out her cigarette with a custom made Louboutin flat and says, through a final exhale of smoke, “Doesn’t this place have valet parking? I can never get these stupid things in a space.”

Starr E. Dreams has certainly never failed to make an entrance, and tonight was no different. She is Drew Barrymore the 2010 Edition, but no one expects her to turn out as well as Drew. She’s a wild child with an absentee father and a fame-whore mother. She had no chance.

Despite people’s skepticism, Starr E. Dreams is her real name. None of that Demetria Guynes turned Demi Moore business for her. And to make sure no one ever forgot it; acquaintances, co-workers; even friends and family were contractually obligated to call her one of three things. Acceptable names were Starr, Starr E. or Starr E. Dreams. No other iteration would be tolerated, and you can bet her mother would have you in court for breach of contract if you tried.

Her mother, one Roberta Nelson, had tried desperately to be an actress. She gave up 10 years of her life to waitressing and casting calls. The closest she came to a big break was the time she was almost an extra on CSI. She showed up for an open call and they took the first 100 people. Guess who number 101 was.

Roberta decided after “selflessly giving up her own flourishing career for motherhood”, as she was often quoted saying in interviews that if she couldn’t make it one of her kids would. So when her baby girl was born the dream began again. She was determined to have this baby not only succeed in the business, but exceed those who came before. Roberta was determined for Starr to beat Tatum O’Neal’s Oscar win at 10. She only had a year and a half left to make it happen.

Starr had certainly been working hard since her debut in a creative reimagining of Peter Pan. She played Wendy, a little girl with Dissociative Identity Disorder whose primary other personality was a little boy named Peter who never grew up. She also had to contend with her personality, Tinkerbelle, a transvestite hooker with a heart of gold. It was gritty stuff. Surprisingly it was not well received.

She followed that star-turn with a creative reimagining of The Wizard of Oz. She played Dorothy, a little girl with Dissociative Identity Disorder whose primary other personalities were a scarecrow, a tin man, a lion and a wizard. This film didn’t do that well either.

Her mother was certain the next film would be the winner they were looking for though. Starr was all set to do a creative reimagining of The Breakfast Club. She would play Claire, a little girl with Dissociative Identity Disorder whose primary other personalities were a brain, and an athlete, and a basket case, a princess, and a criminal. Roberta felt certain this would draw in Starr’s fans as well as their parents, who were hopefully fans of the original movie.

Starr looked around at the storm she had created. There were flashbulb lightening bolts and thunderous shouted questions. She froze for a second and then said the first thing that came into her mind, “seriously people…can someone clean this shit up and get me a martini?”

2. The lovely Sara (who spells her name correctly) at Everyday Life with the Nevilles tagged me. I seriously need a few days to think of some more questions to pass on so I'll be doing this one on Monday! I feel certain some weekend margaritas will help.

3. And to start your weekend off right...a happy girl...
Have a great weekend one and all!