November 12, 2010

Just too much

This week, we'll use inspiration photos from Easy Street Prompts, a site that we mentioned in yesterday's post.

We'll do this just like last time we used photo prompts. if you're a fiction writer, use the photo as your inspiration. If you are in the mood for some non-fiction, write a piece based on a life experience that the photo brings to mind.

Here are your two photos to choose from (click on a title to see the photo):
Promises
Resigned

Your post needn't be a literal translation of the photo; you may find that it simply serves as a jumping off point.


RESULT:



Vivi's eyes wouldn't survive another tear. They were swollen and bruised to the level of absurd. She had been crying for days and it felt like she would never stop. She would have been content to stay in her room endlessly, but Mother had sent her to the store for milk. Vivi knew they didn't really need milk, but Mother was clearly ready for a break from the weeping.

She couldn't believe it had only been 4 days ago when the men knocked on her door. It was every girls worst nightmare, the men in their crisp uniforms and shiny shoes. They simply asked if she was Vivian Temple and then handed her a telegram. It was the heaviest single piece of paper she had ever held. So heavy, in fact, that she could no longer stand under its weight. Vivi crumbled and hit the foyer floor at the same time as the fluttering missive.

It was a full 11 hours later before Vivi could bring herself to open the telegram.

"URGENT REPRT -(STOP)- INFANTRY UNDER ATTACK -(STOP)- LT FRANK PARKER GRAVELY INJURED -(STOP)- WILL SEND UPDATE POST HASTE"

They were getting married. It was all Vivi could think. Married as soon as he returned from this ridiculous fighting. And then they would start their lives together. They would have a lovely, church ceremony with a reception at the Holiday Inn, a honeymoon in the Catskills, and then the good part, a house of their own and a family. It would be perfect. But now...

Vivi kept breathing, kept moving. She had no memory of her activities from one day to the next. She was simply alive, but not living. The hours turned to days, and slowly into weeks. Vivi jumped at every car driving past the house, every knock on the door. She told anyone who asked that she was fine and would hear word of Lt. Parker any day now. But in her quiet moments, late at night, she had begun to doubt.

On the 27th day the men came back. Vivi was just returning home from her daily trip to the store. She was lost in thought about Mother's bones, thinking they must be stronger than ever with all the milk she had been drinking lately, when she saw them. The crisp uniforms, the shiny shoes...she saw them and froze. After a moment they turned to leave, and saw her standing like a statue at the end of the walk.

Again they asked if she was Vivian Temple, and when she nodded, they silently handed her another telegram. This time she tore it open on the spot, certain it contained the news she had been dreading.

"I KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN CRYING -(STOP)- I KNOW YOU HAVE BEEN WORRYING -(STOP)- I KNOW YOU LOVE ME - DONT -(STOP)- I'LL BE HOME SOON"

Vivi read the telegram again, and again, and again. After reading it for what felt like the 800th time, she ran inside.

"Mother," she called breathlessly, "MOTHER! Frank is fine! He's okay! He'll be home soon!"

Her mother's voice floated out to her from the back of the house, "That's lovely dear. Did you get my milk?"

*****

A serious story? From me? It's a world gone mad. And clearly not a construct I'm particularly comfortable in...so be gentle.

Comments (14)

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Seriously. I *really* enjoy your writing. I know I"ve told you that it has inspired me to check out the red writing hood- and it has. I just need to remember to check it out and actually write. In the meantime, I'll just continue reading your stuff cuz I like it so. Happy Friday, Weekend!
For a serious piece it was very well done. I'm glad you ended it happily.

Visiting From Red Writing Hood
Oh, I love your serious side too. This was great!
Bravo, Sara, you nailed it. I'm not surprised you ended it in a comical way though. It wouldn't be you otherwise. This was fantastic.
I love it! And I love that it had a happy ending! Now I will have to come back and read more!

Stopped by from Red Writing Hood.
Sometimes it's good to try something different. I think there's also a good story about that mother..
I can't ever get enough of your writing. As always, your story was great!
You did this really well. The tension of not knowing was palpable.
oh I could feel her heaviness... and THAT mother....argh
That mother is some woman... i am glad that you gave us a happy ending
I so enjoyed this post!
I love that you went with the happy ending, as I think it could have been cliche had he died.
I was sure that the telegram would include bad news. Great job with the surprise!
How fun! I will have to try this sometime!!
I felt that the writing here was really, REALLY well done! I even enjoyed the surprise happy ending! And I agree with Cheryl that this story would be interesting from the Mother's point of view!
Great story. You are such a talented writer. You really draw me in and I can feel the emotions of your characters. Vivi ... what a nice name ... just saying ;)

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