We're trying something new this week and giving you two choices. We are feeling crazy! Woohoo!
1. Describe your 80th birthday party.
2. If you could spend the afternoon with anyone who is no longer alive, who would it be and what would you do? (And yes, we mean someone who has died that you would want to spend a day with, not that you would spend the day with an actual dead person!)
Pick whichever you like. Combine them, if you want. You can also do it as fiction or non-fiction.
"Happy birthday dear Hattie, happy birthday to you!"
Hattie couldn't fault the motley group gathered around the rec room snack table. They certainly were enthusiastic, if not always in tune. That little twit, Chaz, from the front desk was a different story though. After he added, "and many moooore...heh...oops" to the song, she started plotting how to trip him with her cane.
Hattie wasn't particularly fond of birthdays, and this one was especially upsetting. At 80, she was the youngest in her group of peers at the Golden Acres Retirement Home (where you can spend your golden years on our golden acres). That should have made it easy to pick up George. George was the hubba-hubba hunk of the place, and at a spry 85 didn't look a day over 82.
Things had been going along swimmingly. And Hattie was sure George was about to ask her on a date, and possibly if he could be her escort for the birthday celebration. And that's when Adele started sniffing around. Adele, at 91, was the Golden Acres Cougar. She liked her men young and she liked them frequently if the staff gossip was to be believed. Hattie had no proof, but she was certain Adele was the cause of the recent outbreak of The Clap.
Hattie hated playing games, but she was starting to wonder if she could use Edmond to make George jealous. Edmond had spent at least 45 minutes of every day asking if anyone would be interested in his 'junk in a box' since that SNL sketch aired. That would be roughly 1,100 hours that he'd spent discussing his man business with his fellow residents.
Yeah...so I totally lost the thread here. All I know is that I was headed for a 16 Candles moment with Hattie and George on the rec room table, but I have no idea how I'm getting there. Also I think Edmond may be an unnecessary character....
I blame the baby. Just look how pleased she is with herself.