February 8, 2011

Well damn

I don't know where it came from, but all of a sudden I'm completely certain of something. A disturbing something. I am old. I know, I know...it's shocking...but it's true. I present you with the following disheartening evidence:
  1. Pie loves music. I mean LOVES it. So we listen to music a lot. Every once in a while I'll turn on VH1 and we'll watch videos since Pie also likes to dance and watch dancing. This weekend we watched for about an hour, and for every band/artist I knew, there were ten that I didn't. VH1 people...not even MTV...I mean what the hell are Sick Puppies?
  2. I almost never, NEVER get carded anymore. Unless I'm at one of those 'we card everyone' places, people know I'm over 21.
  3. I have fully crossed over into parental hypocrisy. I can say with a straight face, "I don't want Pie eating that crap" (which could apply to just about anything non-organic or junky) while I dominate a bag of Black and White trail Mix from Target. And of course by dominate I mean pick out all the chocolate/yogurt covered peanuts and raisins and leave everything else in the bag.
  4. I am now only referred to as Ma'am by grocery store workers and Target staff. I never get a, "Hey, can I help you?" it's always a very respectful, "Hello ma'am, can I help you find something?" What? Are they afraid I'm going to break a hip or something?
  5. I have a friend who is single and dating and when I hear about it, all I can think is, "Eh, thank god that's not me" or, "Those crazy kids and their interwebs dating, it's madness!"
  6. The phrase. "I'm too old for this sh*t" is heard around our house on a daily basis.
  7. Telling people that I don't know what I want to be when I grow up has crossed over from cute and ironic when I said it as a 20 year old, to being...well...incredibly sad at 33.
  8. I make active decisions about things like chimney cleaning and termite control.
  9. Conversations with friends are much more likely to be about baby poop than the hot guy who just moved in next door.
  10. Speaking of hot dudes...I'm WAY more turned on by a guy who is an awesome dad, than one who has awesome buns. Now, if they have both attributes, I'm in heaven.

What about you guys? Anything lately that has driven home your age?